We’re 11 days into lockdown in South Africa. In our industry, we’re used to working from home and really though this would be business as usual for us. But what has happened is that we are working 10 times more than we did before! With everyone at home now, people have got more time to work and the phone and emails don’t stop, but it’s started calming down a bit as people settle into their routines and accept what’s happened. We are extremely grateful for this position and for being in IT at this point in history, yet abundantly aware of the knock on effect – if our clients close, we close. I can’t even comprehend how many companies are facing that reality and what that will mean, so we are truly grateful for still having work.
Quite frankly though, I’m exhausted.
Lockdown and the state of the world has gotten to me the past 2 days. I’m struggling to focus, lost my sense of purpose, heartbroken at what we are going through, trying to process the magnitude of what’s befallen us; struggling to fit in when I have different perspective on things to most people, holding back tears; scared, anxious, angry, not sleeping, getting fat, worried about all the people I care about, trying desperately to keep a handle on my sanity, and just so very very very tired. The multiple hats I wear in life just means multiple points of stress and worry. But I am SO extremely grateful to have met someone before all this went down who is staying with me during this crisis – I honestly have no idea how I would have coped without him. He is a pillar of strength every day.
We are in an unprecedented time in history. Of all the things I envisioned in life, this was not one of them, this situation is mind-blowing.
As a business owner, employer and entrepreneur, I’m used to tough times. I’ve had to rebuild my company from scratch 3 times in 10 years for various reasons, started my business the middle of a recession and still made a massive success of it. It’s all given me the strength and tools to get through this too. We will rebuild again if we need to, cos that’s just what we do. If we fall down, we get up fast, then do things better.
It’s a rough couple of days for me, it will pass and I will find my mojo again. There are people that rely on me and I won’t let them down. My greatest asset is my resilience and solution oriented view on life. But if you are in the same position, just know that you are not alone and a trouble shared is a trouble halved. Us business owners will find a way out of this mess, that’s just what we do – we just have good days and bad days like everyone else.
Post Blog Update – 8 April 2020 – and back to normal again. See, it doesn’t take long. Rest when you need to.