Have you ever put someone on a pedestal and then be totally crushed when they disappoint you?
Friends, lovers, family, colleagues, business partners, life partners, bosses – there’s usually someone around you that you simply idolise above all isn’t there. Those special people who you think the world of, who you believe would never do anything dodgy to you or anyone else, you believe will always do the right thing, who you trust have your best interests at heart. But then suddenly and always unexpectedly, they come with the empty promises, abandon you, steal from you, use you, cheat on you, betray you – all manor of hurts, then simply carry on with life as though nothing has happened while you’re a pile of ash on the floor. (Why people feel it’s ok to behave in this way in the first place is the subject for another day, but anyway).
I’m sure you can relate.
Why do we do this in the first place? Why do we feel it is necessary to idolise another to the point of blindness? Are we just too trusting? No-one is perfect, no-one. We all have our faults, insecurities, fears, things we’re trying to live through, with or for. And yet people do it all the time.
I saw a thing on Facebook the other day, some kid had to do a school project on his hero. People were suggesting all kinds of famous people, but I immediately thought to myself, why can’t he be his own hero? Why can’t we all? Why do we have to be idolising another in order to feel worthy or successful or whatever the driver is in people? We all know it doesn’t end well when their human side comes out, because no-one knows how to love unconditionally, so why do we do it? We defer our power to everything and anything around us, anything not to take ownership of our own lives after all ….
It’s hard to pick yourself up from these kinds of things. Every day is a challenge. You drag yourself through the day wishing time away. You question everything. It really sucks being a human sometimes doesn’t it. And yes yes I know, enlightenment, ‘we are here’, karma, blah blah blah. It doesn’t make the realities of life any easier when the going gets tough.
So what do we learn in when we’re in that awkward stage between birth and death? Maybe that every time you play victim to your circumstance, you are going to come up second best? That you can choose how to feel about anything that happens in your life. That you can get up and go on and thrive! That you can start again at any time. That it’s ok to feel down about these things. That everything you need is inside of you and always has been. That YOU can be your own hero.
Don’t give up on yourself. New companions will come.