Why, SharePoint “Men”? Why?

I would love to know what gives some of the men in the SharePoint community the right to  attack, victimise, humiliate and traumatise the women in this community.

I have been on the receiving end of the most despicable behaviour over the past 6 and a bit years in SharePoint by these so called SharePoint specialists – and I’m by far not alone in the way I was treated.  Well I’m sick of it!

You know exactly who you are – there’s a couple of you in particular, cozy little friends that you are.  If I wasn’t afraid of being sued because that’s just how screwed up you are, I would splatter your names across every billboard on every highway!

And I know you read my blog, so this is just for you.

Tell you what – why don’t you grow a set of balls, go to a finishing school and learn how to treat people with respect!  This job is hard enough without you undermining any effort made to to make a difference and contribute positively. Karma is a bitch, just remember that.

I mean really, what is it?  Is your manhood so threatened by a girl with brains that you feel it’s necessary to run them down for no reason whatsoever.   You are giving the whole industry a bad name with your behaviour!  Why don’t you learn from some of the true gentlemen out there, cos there’s plenty to choose from in our industry.  In the words of Twisted Sister, “If that’s your best, your best won’t do!”.

Get over yourselves!  Please!

Pathetic…

Schmuck

18 comments

  1. Hi Susan,

    Thanks for taking the time to comment and your kind sentiments. Luckily it’s something I have completely put behind me now and I have a completely new outlook on life. There are truly wonderful men out there and we are lucky to know them. And if you’ve been at the receiving end of this kind of treatment, may you have the courage to say no more and expect better. Cos you do! 🙂 Have an awesome weekend.

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  2. Hi Veronique,

    For similar reasons as you describe above, I won’t say how I found this blog, only that I’m glad I found it 🙂

    I’m sorry you’ve been treated this way and glad that the majority of guys are more gallant than those few.

    Susan
    (SharePoint dev in constant state of progress and flux.)
    coffeeandsharepoint.blogspot.com

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  3. I am very new to Sharepoint having only recently taken on a new management role where the company uses Sharepoint extensively. Until 6 weeks ago I had not even heard of it. Being very competent with IT and enjoy learning I have been trying to learn as much as I can about Sharepoint.

    I can say that I other than Microsoft, I have been able to learn more from the free resources you provide than any other site. I was similarly impressed with your Lets Collaborate site. Great work, keep it up.

    Hopefully those ‘faceless’ and ‘spineless’ individuals who are only jealous of your achievements, will leave you alone in 2013.

    If someone can point me in the direction of good Sharepoint videos that are downloadable, I would very much appreciate it.

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  4. Hi Chris,

    Yes you are so right. I am constantly amazed by some of the wonderful people in the SharePoint community who go out of their way to help someone or make them feel better about something. It’s really heartwarming to see. Thanks for the ‘chin up old chap’. 🙂 I really appreciate it. It’s guys like you that make it all worthwhile. We just ignore the ones that don’t from now on. Quite simple really. 🙂

    ..V..

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  5. Veronique.. I thinking you are doing some great work, both in the SharePoint world and on this blog. Keep up the efforts, and don’t let the few grind you down. As the comments show here, plenty of us are very much on your side.

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  6. Hi Tom,

    First of all, thank you so much for introducing me to Kathy Sierra. I just read a ton of her blogs, and wow! I love this woman!!! With the value of that content she writes, I am astounded by the abuse that she was subject to. It’s shameful, really. I’ve emailed her, I really hope the address is still valid and that she replies. I think she’s great!

    Secondly, thank you for becoming so aware and educating yourself on the matter of intimidation and sexism. It’s a very real reality that goes on daily across the world in SharePoint. I’ve had plenty ladies tell me horrendous stories about it. Our silence allows this abuse to go on, things have to change.

    While it was very tempting to give up and walk away because of the abuse of these few, one cannot let the voice of a few drown out the voice of many as they say. I’m not going anywhere. I know the abusers are in the serious minority, but they can be so vicious that’s it’s hard to ignore them. I have taken every step possible to get as far away from them as possible, but they keep pushing their opinions down my throat. Luckily technology is on our side for a change, there are block and report functions across all the social platforms. 😉

    Thank you for your kind words and support Tom, it is very much appreciated.

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  7. I used to be blissfully unaware that there were problems surrounding women in the tech industry. I guess because I had always worked around (and for) women, I just assumed they were coworkers and people like myself. That all changed when Kathy Sierra (of Head First fame) went through her very visible online harassment nightmare (http://geekfeminism.wikia.com/wiki/Kathy_Sierra_incident). That was my “time to wake up” moment. Since then, I’ve tried to be *much* more aware of intimidation and sexism in the workplace (and specifically in IT) and step up to say something when and wherever I see it.

    It’s a shame that this issue even exists, much less that we have to talk about it. But it’s very real, and it’s painful to see exceptionally talented people be hurt just because someone doesn’t think they were born with the right body parts.

    Thanks for being part of the community and sharing, Veronique. We’d all be very much poorer without the contributions you (and many others) make.

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  8. Wow. As one of the good guys (I hope), I apologize for the few that make the rest of us look bad. I for one love your blog and posts. And David, I’m in on the leg breaking if you need help.

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  9. Hehe, I’ll keep that in mind, thanks. 🙂

    Yeah, it happens much more often than you think unfortunately. Luckily there are plenty of wonderful men in the community too that can drown out these few bad ones. But those bad ones have done terrible damage over the years.

    A wonderful Christmas to you too.

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  10. Hey, if you need some legs broken in the US, let me know. I, um… know people… 😉

    I’m surprised to hear about this, even in our tight community of SharePointers. It’s sad and I hope you all the best! Merry Christmas!

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  11. I agree with Veronique, just because an unpleasant mode of behavior is ubiquitous, doesn’t mean we have to stand by quietly shaking our heads.

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  12. Yes that’s true Steven. There’s one in every crowd and I can assure you I will overcome. I just don’t think that it’s right that this happens at all – and so often.

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  13. I am not familiar with the particular people and incidents you are referring too and it would be speculation as to their motives. What I would remind you is that in any group of people there are those that will behave in this manner. Try to overcome.

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